it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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