scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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