from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Randomize
