then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
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I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
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Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
is it fun? or sober?
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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