Christians are straight up FREAKS
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
