we have officially lost it.
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Randomize
