I'm going to jail i love you
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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