if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Randomize