Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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