are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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