He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Randomize
