he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Randomize
