I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
Randomize
