I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
