If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Randomize
