When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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