Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
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