alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize
