didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Randomize
