Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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