tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize