he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
