Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
