I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
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