Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
