what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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