Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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