Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
