I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
