What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize
