Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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