filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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