Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
My underwear smells like fireworks.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
3pm strippers are depressing
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
