the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Randomize
