I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
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