It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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