So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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