She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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