I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
