Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Randomize