I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize