I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
