I didn't shave. On purpose
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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