Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
