Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
How's work?
Spinning.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Randomize
