I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
