I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
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