I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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