gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
You have to summon your inner elephant
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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