she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Randomize
